09-07-YC125

I may have been somewhat brusque with Kley in a conversation tonight.  If one can call it a conversation.  I have such mixed feelings on her these days.  I cannot, nor would not, deny her courage and her devotion to duty, or at least what she sees as her duty, but I do doubt one or two other things.  Her sanity to name but one.

She thinks she is likely to be tried for treason, by which she refers to her unilateral usurping of the entire Holdership of Raravoss III.  By rights, of course, she ought to be, but Khanids seem to have a certain way of neatly avoiding repercussions.  I know some would put it down to simple jealousy on my part - after all, she is just a commoner, with no breeding or upbringing to give her the proper understandings needed to rule a Holding, but it is more than that.  I think, in part, she is a symbol, a symptom even, of whatever it is that is afflicting our poor Empire.  All these lower stations thinking better of themselves and upsetting the natural balance.  It is more than a little disconcerting.

I really should not dwell on such things, but I cannot help it.  It is either that that occupies my mind or worrying about Ishta.  True, yes, I am deeply concerned of the potential consequences for us as well as her.  I had hoped for much brighter times.  I have no doubt that Sasha is going to push to go back to active duty (there is another thing I am angry at Kley for - my whole team could have been killed outright supporting her foolish little adventure) but that is most certainly not happening whilst Ishta's business is still going on.  It will prey on his mind, even if he denies it, and I will not risk my little brother's life like that.

Although, in all honesty, I would not entirely dismiss the idea of returning to Raravoss myself.  Catching some of the enemy in my rifle sights would be ever so cathartic. I do miss Naval Infantry duties at times.

I should think this task the Directrix has given me shall be an acceptable alternative, if a decidedly less dangerous venture.  I am just waiting to speak to Edward to arrange our first meeting.  I am rather looking forward to it.  Edward always finds a way to uplift my spirits.

And who knows, I may even eventually convert him to The Faith.

Just the thought makes me smile.

 02-07-YC125

How strange it is to have to seal away my diaries written during my time as Imperial Navy Liaison Officer.  One wonders if they shall ever see the light of day.  Yulia joked that some day in the future my writings would be gathered together by students of Amarrian society to ponder over, but there would be a year-long gap which would frustrate them as they imagined all sorts of secrets and intrigue.  A very amusing thought, if rather fanciful.

It is a pleasure, of course, to return, although the opportunity to spend so long with my dear Kolya shall be something I always treasure.  To what do I return?  Such changes big and small, both here in Nakri and across New Eden itself, some for the better, some perhaps not so much.

Poor Ishta.  I am glad I saw her at the Awards last night, but it is clear she is fretting terribly.  She has not been home in a very long time and I worry she is isolating herself unnecessarily.  We shall never abandon her, though her past crimes, now caught up with her, are grave indeed.  Yet if only those who seek their so-called justice could see with clear eyes what she has become.  Surely they would see God's Blessings present in Ishta.  Can there be any better proof of the Divine than the conversion of such a wicked sinner? She is, without any doubt, far more worthy and noble than that vile Heretic Nauplius, or Kley, who conducts herself less and less in a manner befitting a Paladin and who appears to be carving herself out her own little fiefdom.

The murder of Holders!  By a commoner! Truly these are dark times.  True enough they reneged upon their sworn oaths to Lord Sarum, but they should have been brought to trial, not brutally executed and rolled into some water-logged ditch, or whatever distasteful outcome Kley arbitrarily decided was to be their fate.  I have a strong mind to raise this matter with the Chapter Master.  And quite honestly, who turns up to a Writing Awards Ceremony in battle-armour? How gauche!

There were a number of rather unsophisticated scenes last night, sadly, but it did not, I am happy to say, detract in any significant way from the Directrix's organisational skills or abilities to host a superior class of event.  She herself is looking most bright and beautiful with the baby on the way, if somewhat tired.  Hardly surprising, of course; even at this stage of pregnancy she simply does not stop from fulfilling all her many duties.  An admirable woman indeed, and yet another who may not be noble of birth, but is most certainly so of soul.  

Most unexpectedly, the Directrix had a task for me.  Little time has passed since a returned from one liaison role before I am given another, this time to assuage the concerns and fears of the Federation over LUMEN's mission within their systems.  They think we intend to march over their planets, praying and chanting, converting the heathen and bringing The Word of God to all.  Somewhat ironic, really, given the Federation's much-vaunted "virtues" of religious tolerance and openness.  As the Directrix says, anyone who wants to hear The Word we shall accept with open arms, as is our duty to God, and it is not as if The Faith is completely unknown in the Federation.  The powers that be just know that once people start to compare the knowledge of Salvation through God to the false promises the Federation gives them of prosperity and freedom from want; well, it is hardly any competition, is it?

The most amusing part of this task, however, is that it will mean spending a lot of time with Edward, as a result of his status and role.  He did seem rather pleased with the idea when I told him last night, when he finally turned up.  I cannot say I am not happy with this turn of events.  I like Edward.  Despite his rough edges he is a good person at heart, and I know I can help him to understand that there is nothing sinister or untoward in LUMEN's work.  I think perhaps, like many, he is finding it hard to adapt to the new Treaty, the sudden thawing of relations between our Empire and the Federation.  I should imagine it is a hard concept for many to accept.  There have been few as adaptable as my family to changing currents, both now and in history.

One of the secrets to deSilvestris success, I suppose.  One has to always be ready to turn a situation to one's advantage.

 <<EDITOR'S NOTE:  Despite the best efforts of the archivists here, a large section of Lady Ekaterina's diaries cannot be found.  Some of these fall within the time of Her Ladyship's position of PIE liaison officer to the Imperial Navy, and it is possible that they contain sensitive or even classified information.  We do know that Lady Ekaterina had some involvement with a high ranking Naval Officer some time in the mid-130s, and there is some conjecture that this officer may have taken the diaries from that afore-mentioned time.

It is also possible, however, that they have simply been mislaid, and myself and my fellow archivists shall continue our search, so that we may piece together an ever-clearer picture of the life of Lady Ekaterina deSilvestris and her family.>>

 11-06-YC124

Ishta and I made peace, fortunately.  I think she sees her error in judgement.  Whilst I had no personal cause or even desire to keep any and all information connected with Sanctity from her, I had my orders and she knows very well I shall never willingly neglect my duties.  I still do not think she understands that being loyal to the Empire and holding such a position of responsibility in it, I do not have the freedom that most capsuleers do.  So many of them think they are a law unto themselves, that they serve no higher power.  That is why New Eden is in the state it is.  Of course, the same could easily be said of many non-capsuleers, especially those who hold high office.

I do wish, however, that Ishta would control her impulses better.  It seems that she has "adopted" some under-station orphans into a make-shift family for her and Sasha.  Only they are not actually adopted, at least as far as the authorities would be concerned.  They are stolen and kidnapped from their lawful Holders after running away.

The usual story, as one might expect.  Abuse and mistreatment, and of a particularly vile kind in the case of two or three of them.  Law is law, true, but I simply cannot condone such despicable behaviour toward children.  What is done about that is really up to Ishta, with the Directrix's guidance, but I shall be more than happy to help care for the children until the right course of action presents itself.  How typical of Ishta to take advantage of my lowest resistance!

We cannot have them at home, though, for obvious reasons, so any assistance rendered will have to be from afar.  Ishta intends to keep them at Gottin's Lamp, and they are as safe, if not safer, there than anywhere else.  My part will have to wait until my return from Khanid Prime.

I have never been here before, and in all honesty I was not expecting my duties to bring me here, but we require some liaison between the Praetorians and Khanid Innovations and whilst I do need recuperation time from Sanctity I simply cannot sit idle.  So here I am.  I admit I was a little anxious about a welcoming ceremony involving yaks or some such cultural difference - and I cannot even think of that animal without bursting into giggles, they are such a strange creature - but fortunately it was just a simple greeting.  My tasks will be security related, but if I have time I should meet up with the LUMEN branch that is based here.  I forget how large and widespread this alliance is and how I have compatriots everywhere!  I hear Khanid have very nice tea.

I just very much hope there are as few yaks as possible.

 06-06-YC124

I should have stayed in Raravoss; at least the Triglavians inflict physical wounds.  Ishta has every right to be angry and upset, to be worried for Sasha and to be frustrated at not being informed of the situation, but to call me scum?  To hold this family in the same contempt as she holds slavers and unsavoury, abusive Holders?  Sometimes I think Nauplius is right, Matari can never change their spiteful, hate-filled nature.

Well, she need not worry for Sasha anymore.  There shall be no wedding now, of that she can be sure, and I shall be there for my brother when he wakes and his family, his real family, shall help him recover.  I do not know how he is going to react to being rejected and abandoned, not to mention having his daughter taken from him.  Felix shall miss the Little One as well.  No-one to read stories to every night.

I am sure she shall have plenty of people to take care of her in Gottin's Lamp, and I expect the Directrix will look after her.  I hope Ishta does not wound that caring soul.

I should have expected this.  I should have trusted my instincts at the start.  We are too soft as a family, too trusting and accepting.  Too forgiving.  I wish Ishta no ill-will, but to direct such venom and hatred at me, at us, is unacceptable after all we have done for her.

No more.  We must harden our hearts, as painful as that may be.  Strangely, though, as shocked as I was when she had her outburst, I feel no pain.  I do not feel anything at all, in truth, neither anger nor hate, nor sorrow.  Just a vague sense of loss, but mostly I just feel numb.  Yet what is there to do except pick up the pieces and carry on?

Just as we always have.

 04-06-YC124

I visited Sasha as soon as I got to Arx Garum.  He was sleeping, still recovering from his injuries.  The doctors say he is likely to require a replacement eye and hand, but other than that he should fully recover, in time.  Ishta was there, of course, but she barely said two words to me.  She is worried and afraid, which is understandable but sooner or later she will lose Sasha regardless.  Such is the price for immortality.  Major Natashova spoke to me regarding Ishta, telling me she had been tired and stressed.  For all her flaws and doubts, Ishta is quite a gentle, soft soul, deep down.

The team are stood down on Arx Garum until further notice.  They need time to recover and rest.  I, however, have no such luxury.  After seeing Sasha I immediately clone-jumped home to Nakri, then took a shuttle to the State.  LUMEN anti-piracy operations are under way and I must do my part there as well.  I am rather looking forward to being back in a pod, in all truth. It has been some time.

The vodka and bath shall simply have to wait.

 02-06-YC124

I write this sitting in the compartment of an armoured transport.  We are on our way back to Arx Garum after six months planetside.  It has gone rather quickly, I feel.

All in all, Operation Sanctity has been, to my mind, a success.  Enemy communications disrupted, materiel destroyed or rendered beyond use, key personnel neutralised.  We have taken casualties, some serious, but, God and The Eternal Empress be praised, no fatalities; and the number of enemy souls we have returned to the judgement of God is beyond counting.

The evacuation was precarious, I must admit.  The enemy had the area surrounded and we had to clear it before our transport could come in.  Not an easy task with two wounded, and Pankov and Idrisov had both been injured by the time we were lifting off again.  They will make it to Arx Garum, though, and they will recover.

The most important victory, though, is symbolic.  We have shown that the Empire does not simply surrender its sovereign territory to a merciless invader and their unprovoked offensive.  They may have temporarily taken these systems, but we will still strike back at them, wherever and however we can.  We have also shown that traitors, cowards, and collaborators will not escape our wrath either.  I cannot deny I would rather have simply executed that pitiful excuse for a Holder and his family as we pulled them from their bolt-hole, but Il-Khan Oniseki-Kley prefers that they stand trial and so shall it be.  It shows, I suppose, her worthiness to take the title, or at least that she meets the necessary standards of integrity more so than those who failed Her Imperial Majesty.

Ishta did not appear, so I can only assume she found out where Sasha is and went to him instead.  I shall no doubt have to face her when we arrive at the station.  I already know she will not see our Operation for what it is, but I care little, for my team, the 601st, they do understand, and as I look around the compartment at their faces, I can see that they know the value of what we have done, of what we do, and of the sacrifices we make.  Even Bordashevskaya, with her breathing heavy after the gas attack, looks contented with duty well done.

Once I have deal with Ishta, I am going to get a vodka and a bath.

Amarr Victor!