You're where the Wild Things are...

An in-character blog set in the universe of EVE Online. These are the private diary entries of Lady Ekaterina Mariya deSilvestris, a minor Amarrian Noble and Capsuleer. Other existing characters within EVE will be referred to throughout, though any opinions and views expressed are those of this character. These entries may touch on or directly address mature themes such as violence, sexuality, race and ethnicity, and mental health. As noted, any views are those of the character.

Before we begin, I feel it important to say a few words on the subject of mental health. Ekaterina, or Ekat as many call her, is something of a troubled soul. This aspect of her character is a personal choice I have made, for very personal reasons. Although EVE is a game in which the players can immerse themselves to a greater or lesser degree as they wish, mental health is a very real issue for many people. Those two simple words cover a myriad different issues and concerns that affect people directly or indirectly every day all, over the world.

If you find yourself affected by any issues touched upon in these posts, or if you face your own troubles, please know that there are people out there you can turn to; doctors, friends, family - there is ALWAYS someone. If you are an EVE player, then Broadcast 4 Reps chat is available, staffed by wonderfully kind and good-hearted volunteers. If you know of someone who has mental health issues, then please just let them know you are there. It doesn't have to be anything big, just a smile, a cup of tea, a quick phone call about last night's game - just a little thing to show they aren't forgotten.

You Never Fly Alone.

 06-06-YC124


I should have stayed in Raravoss; at least the Triglavians inflict physical wounds.  Ishta has every right to be angry and upset, to be worried for Sasha and to be frustrated at not being informed of the situation, but to call me scum?  To hold this family in the same contempt as she holds slavers and unsavoury, abusive Holders?  Sometimes I think Nauplius is right, Matari can never change their spiteful, hate-filled nature.

Well, she need not worry for Sasha anymore.  There shall be no wedding now, of that she can be sure, and I shall be there for my brother when he wakes and his family, his real family, shall help him recover.  I do not know how he is going to react to being rejected and abandoned, not to mention having his daughter taken from him.  Felix shall miss the Little One as well.  No-one to read stories to every night.

I am sure she shall have plenty of people to take care of her in Gottin's Lamp, and I expect the Directrix will look after her.  I hope Ishta does not wound that caring soul.

I should have expected this.  I should have trusted my instincts at the start.  We are too soft as a family, too trusting and accepting.  Too forgiving.  I wish Ishta no ill-will, but to direct such venom and hatred at me, at us, is unacceptable after all we have done for her.

No more.  We must harden our hearts, as painful as that may be.  Strangely, though, as shocked as I was when she had her outburst, I feel no pain.  I do not feel anything at all, in truth, neither anger nor hate, nor sorrow.  Just a vague sense of loss, but mostly I just feel numb.  Yet what is there to do except pick up the pieces and carry on?

Just as we always have.

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