You're where the Wild Things are...

An in-character blog set in the universe of EVE Online. These are the private diary entries of Lady Ekaterina Mariya deSilvestris, a minor Amarrian Noble and Capsuleer. Other existing characters within EVE will be referred to throughout, though any opinions and views expressed are those of this character. These entries may touch on or directly address mature themes such as violence, sexuality, race and ethnicity, and mental health. As noted, any views are those of the character.

Before we begin, I feel it important to say a few words on the subject of mental health. Ekaterina, or Ekat as many call her, is something of a troubled soul. This aspect of her character is a personal choice I have made, for very personal reasons. Although EVE is a game in which the players can immerse themselves to a greater or lesser degree as they wish, mental health is a very real issue for many people. Those two simple words cover a myriad different issues and concerns that affect people directly or indirectly every day all, over the world.

If you find yourself affected by any issues touched upon in these posts, or if you face your own troubles, please know that there are people out there you can turn to; doctors, friends, family - there is ALWAYS someone. If you are an EVE player, then Broadcast 4 Reps chat is available, staffed by wonderfully kind and good-hearted volunteers. If you know of someone who has mental health issues, then please just let them know you are there. It doesn't have to be anything big, just a smile, a cup of tea, a quick phone call about last night's game - just a little thing to show they aren't forgotten.

You Never Fly Alone.
30-09-YC121

It seems that not even our own celebrations are safe havens for me now, although I suppose it is only natural we should invite our allies along to a celebration of Her Imperial Majesty's Jubilee.  It seems that some of the Admirals - Paladin-Commanders they are titled now - share my own suspicions over some of those allies, which is reassuring, though it was, as always, nevertheless painful to see the Archbishop and his painted whore dancing about as though they we the centre of attention.  Such bare-faced arrogance from them.  It also appeared that she had made some sort of reconciliation with Ms Phyre, so I am unlikely to find any support there.

It all makes me rather miss Commander Adams when he is not around.  Boorish as his manners can be, he does rather make me smile despite myself.

The situation was not helped by the fact that there was still some tension between Lilya and I.  In the end, finding a quiet moment and a secluded spot, I simply confessed my thoughts and feelings, my fears and worries, though now it seems all a muddle in my mind, as it often does when my emotions get the better of me.  We left the party and went home together.  I think perhaps now we have been truthful with one another, things shall be better between us.

Ishta looked delightful in the dress Mama had given her.  I know she would deny it, of course, but she looked quite the natural.  Indeed, after Lilya, Ishta was the most beautiful woman there.  Poor Sasha, missing such a sight.  How sorrowful it is that our duties must forever obstruct our enjoyment.

Writing of duties, there shall be some changes for all of us following Her Imperial Majesty's Decree of Pax e Kilizhi Do.  It must be a a great concern to Lord and Lady Newelle that Aridia now comes firmly under the auspices of the Khanid, given the disagreement they have had with Sa-Baron Chakaid.  I have no doubt, of course, they are making some contingency plans.  For Sarum, however, the allocation of The Bleak Lands to the new Sarum Military Circuit will, I expect, mean I, and perhaps my whole family, shall be more focused in that Region.  I should not be displeased if it does, for this strange ennui that seems to have overcome me desperately needs dispelling through some sort of action.  I can barely summon the motivation to write this diary.  I cannot even begin to fathom what it is that troubles me so, and drains my energy.  I can only hope it passes soon, or else I fear I shall not be able to bear it for long.  Listlessness and boredom has never brought me any good.
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